Queen of my...apartment building?

So, guess what.....?

We have new neighbors.

again.

Seriously, the apartments below me and above me are rented out like twice a year. Someone moves in, then someone moves out, and on and on. You never get to know any of the neighbors because none of them stick around long enough. I always end up referring to them as "the guy/girl with the hair", or "the guy/girl with the teeth"....because believe me, in this part of town, it's either the hair or the teeth (if the person has any) that needs the most help. An example of both:

I see these things every day.

your pity is most welcome. 

My husband and I have been in this apartment building the longest out of anyone. That's why, each time someone moves in, the Land Lord makes it clear to each new tenant that we are here. It's actually kind of nice to know that the Land Lord cares about us. Actually, come to think of it, out of all the Land Lords we've had, he's probably the best. Okay, I'm shutting up about the goddamn Land Lord.

So, the only thing that's bothering me about the new neighbors--the ones above me--is that they have moved in with too many children to count. They're all quite loud, even if they try not to be. It sounds like a marathon is being run up there. That, piled with:

 "wah, wah, wah!"

"honey, he's just a child"

"shut up! I'm the father in this house!"

there should be more flowers around here.

I can't help but roll my eyes at those upstairs folks. They're a one-of-a-kind family. Plus, every.single.one. of them looks like each other. I'm serious, they all look the same. It's freaky. Like for reals.

Thennnnn, there's the family that's moving in downstairs as I speak--err, type or whatever. They have a 5 year old son that is not afraid of anything....including riding a bike while chewing gum with his shoelaces untied without a helmet. He's always running, climbing, asking questions, running, jumping, asking more questions, interrupting himself to ask a different question, then forgetting about everything and running away. So random....so, so random. His mother says to me yesterday,

"Oh yes, he has A.D.D. but he hasn't been taking his pills lately."

Great. fucking great.

This morning that child was knocking on our door asking my husband if my 2 year old could come outside with him and play, ride bikes, etc.

Why sure, sweetie, my 2 year old would looooove to come out and skate-board with you.

*sigh*

Oh, and another thing. The grandmother is also living downstairs, and this morning while we were getting in the car on our way to the store she comes up to me and says,

 "your little child can sure run, can't he? he's such a good runner! better hope he doesn't trip

and fall up there! but boy, can he sure run! he's such a quick little mover!"

um.

Okay, I'm not sure how I feel about you now....now that you're basically implying that my 2 year old is loud, when all he really does up here is toddle around and watch Elmo while he plays with his train-set. Yes, he runs through the house sometimes, but how can you even hear him with that grand-son of yours bouncing off the furniture down below?

 So yes, all of this is going to be interesting. All I can say is that as we've had a long-running problem with past tenants being noisy past 9:00PM, which is the "courtesy" hour. You know, when children typically should quiet down, loud music should be lowered, etc, etc.

If this isn't the case with this new circus that has arrived in town, I swear I'll be like,

 "you're in my building now, so shut the fuck up after

 9:00 pm, bitches, or I'll get all Mother-like on you're ass".

Be afraid.

Cheers!